2007: Back to the future (3)

In the final installment of my look back at 2007 I want to talk about My favorite chubby and extremely obnoxious hobbit: Bruton Smith.

After his generous efforts in providing a place for people who are physically challenged (they can't make a right turn) but still want to drive really fast, this angel of an individual wanted to build a place for racing professionals who have even worse physical challenges (they can't make a car turn at all). The problem was that he felt he needed to build it in people's backyards and that it's just a tad noisy.

Bruton Smith felt that he could do whatever he wanted on his own land, even though there's a whole subdivision of houses right next to it. Now if I started to build let's say a concert stage in my backyard and had some heavy metal bands play there every weekend, I would guess that eventually some people might complain about that, even though it would be on my land. I have a strong feeling that police might even show up and shut me down.
Apparently you can't apply the same rules to Bruton Smith for the simple reason that he's extremely rich and I'm not.

So when Mr. Smith wanted to build a drag racing strip on land he owns next to his Lowe's Motor Speedway, he decided not to tell anyone but just start building it and see if people would notice.

The rest of the story went something like this:

People did notice that Bruton was building something really close to their house and wondered what it was and what Bruton planned to do so close to the peoples houses. The big bad city council was worried too and they told Bruton that he should stop building and answer some of the questions they had first.
This made Bruton very angry and he stomped his feet and got into a big hissy fit.
He got so mad that he threatened to throw all of his toys away and take away a lot of peoples money and jobs.
The big bad city council realized they made a mistake and wondered how they could make it up to Bruton. Bruton said "why don't you all come kiss my rosy behind and give me lots and lots of money and then maybe I won't be angry no more".

And so it happened; the big bad politicians gave Bruton about 80 million golden dubloons and made planes fly around with banners that said "we love you Bruton". Then they named a whole street after him. They asked for forgiveness and probably kissed his behind too.

Bruton was happy again and said that he would keep his toys here forever. Now he can come to play with his toys by driving over the Bruton Smith Boulevard.
Some blogger man thinks that politicians could save some money on letters by calling the street BS Boulevard, but he's just jealous because Bruton got 80 million dubloons to play with and all blogger man got was higher taxes.

And they all lived happily ever after?

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